Sunday, November 22, 2015

(=) In Line=Always JOY

Thanks so much for your encouragement and all you're doing over there.  Keep going strong!  I love what you say in your emails and hope you're gaining strength from my thoughts.  Keep telling me what the weeks are like! 

Here was our week...


One of our recent converts, JUNIOR, RECEIVED THE PRIESTHOOD! He is inviting all his neighbors to church and coming out to teach with us and studying Preach My Gospel and coming to Youth Activities every week and has terrifically strong and genuine relationships with all the youth.  He loves them and they all love and embrace him.  He is a totally transformed man!  He is constantly and consistently going to school and getting his future set and thinking of his mission, while at the same time leading in his home and building a good atmosphere of love and charity in his previously kind of contentious home.  He has all his priorities right, and you would be so proud of him.  Most importantly, he loves and is unbreakably attached to Jesus Christ, and his own personal testimony of this gospel. The whole family is that strong!  The Recent Converts are all going strong!


The Heading of this emails was (=) that symbol.  It represents that if you are in line with Heavenly Father, no matter what way you face (or what you face) you'll always be smiling.  That power is drawn from making and keeping covenants with Heavenly Father and following Christ more perfectly day by day.

  I am so proud of this Zone.  I love watching each one of the missionaries around me grow.  I love watching the progress each one of us are making together, one week at a time, following one prompting at a time, helping each other through everything.  We are such a tight knit band of brothers and sisters.

I have now caught on to planning far ahead.  I mastered planning and learning how to always reach or exceed my personal and mission goals, and then I wanted to go to the next step--planning effectively at least a week in advance.  On Tuesday after District Meeting, that night, I called the missionaries in my District to assign them their parts in next week's District Meetings rather than waiting till Sunday night to assign it all.  


We are taking very great pride in our Area Book.  I wish you could come down personally and see it.  I'm pleased with our area, very pleased with everything.  So many challenges.  So much growth.  So much still to do; and a clear vision of how to do it!

The other day in Training, Elder Datoon and I sat down together and I told him a big long list of earnestly honest things Heavenly Father had pointed out to me in my observations of him, that are his personal strengths.  We have been focusing on having him serve from his strengths and positively building from there.  He is loving every training and looks forward to them eagerly.  He takes away so much from them and I gain and learn from him every time.  We edify and learn together from one another through the Holy Ghost.

That is the main comment of the week: The Holy Ghost is strong.  I mean so strong.   I accredit everything to how strongly the Holy Ghost is non-stop with us in all we're doing.   It's a real energy and power we can't deny.  During personal studies, we'll totally on our own find scriptures for our investigators and come together in Companionship Studies and see that we both happened to come across the same radically random scripture that was PERFECT for our investigator--and realize the Lord is working through us both unitedly, perfectly.  He's able to freely and fully perform His will through us.   We're grateful for His patience and long suffering as He so lovingly shapes us day by day into more perfect Epistles.
Our lessons every day have been powerful, focused, bearing fruit.  The Spirit is soooo strong!  We have learned how to go in with our objective, get it done, get them on the Spiritual High and wanting more, and then leaving with a return appointment to teach a little more next time.  I love it!  POWERFUL.  Our Member Presents are just phenomenal as well!  They devote their priorities to this missionary work.  The Members and Missionaries really are coming together in this great last Hastening before Christ comes Himself, VERY soon.  We can all feel the joyful urgency. 

A group of YSA's were on their way to go play Volley Ball the other day, just to hang out, when we asked if they would like to come save the world with us.  They each made the decision to come with us.  That day we were blessed to meet Golden individuals and families who agreed that day to devote their lives to Jesus Christ by setting dates when they will be Baptized, and freeing their schedules to have us prepare them for those dates.  Because of people's decisions of total consecration to this work, the Holy Ghost is in more full force than I can describe to you.

This work is fun!  It's simply energizing and exciting and fulfilling and challenging and rich and rewarding!  We are flying higher than we've ever experienced previously.  We can see real and specific growth in ourselves every single week. 

We really are on a higher level every day.  Heavenly Father never stops showing us how.


For next month, we're working with 13 Baptismal Dates.  They are all facing their own challenges and overcoming one hurdle after the next.  We are pleased with their advancing progress. 


We are seeing incredible miracles, and we are constantly laughing, enjoying, "smelling the roses"--as the saying goes--, we are just giving every day all we've got, but at the same time, this work is just energizing for both of us.  We certainly earn our pillows, but, by the next morning, we're fresh and bouncing off the walls with energy for the Lord's work in our thriving and booming area! 

One of many examples I wish I had time to share, was this one man named Joseph, who was a good friend with one of our other Baptismal Dates, and he was at their house and we taught him.  It was so powerful and he eagerly agreed to be Baptized and to come to church the next day.  We told him it would start at 11.  He showed up at 8AM just so he could experience more of it! He came to the Fijian ward and then stayed for the English ward and then just told us how much he loved it!  The members loved him and he loved church... 6 willing and enthusiastically spent hours of it!  He's remarkable and on date for December Baptism

So many more stories like his!!

Elder Datoon had the opportunity to entirely lead 3 lessons on Saturday!  He was so excited to tell me how much he grew from that trust.  He was a little bit nervous at first, and then just faced it and very successfully led the lessons.  He is growing and just more and more positively changing very rapidly.  

Elder Datoon is now freely OYMing in Hindi, he is leading in Companionship Studies, Weekly Plannings, teaching in Hindi, Bearing his Testimony in Hindi from his heart, Praying perfectly in Hindi, and Introducing himself perfectly and is able to ask people questions about themselves and their families, invite Families to be Baptized, pray, etc. etc. IN PERFECT HINDI.  His pronunciation is just perfect, like a local. His Hindi is just through the roof!!!  Who gets all that much down in just their first 2 full weeks in the program?  He has a gift from Heavenly Father and is so perfectly teachable and proactive.  He is so meek.

We are exactly obedient in all things.  We get exact full studies every day, full trainings and full work and full fun and full sleep and full potential. Last night I was watching the District while showering and forgot to bring my watch in with me, so I was a minute late to 10:30. As I got in bed at a minute past, (now with my watch again,) I was happy inside seeing my son in bed a minute ahead, on his complete own accord. I have witnessed his nature, and his actions.  Both are non-stop fully inline with the Lord's will for him. Our natures, are exact obedience, work hard, play hard, enjoy the full potential of each moment. We are both reciting President Layton's 4 keys of success every night with a broad smile and happy hearts at the end of each Nightly Planning.  We just remind ourselves constantly where all our thriving and booming success is coming from--it's coming from living those keys fully.  We're just reaping the results and happy about everything.

I'm so proud of you. 

Keep emailing me!  I want to keep hearing about you!  Stay in touch, because we're both in the same boat together.  Let's just row each other to full strength.  I'm here for you.  I love you.  We're going to accomplish so many more miracles.  This is the work of the Lord.  I know it is.  This work is true.  Not just because of the 1000's of miracles that follow it, but because of the change we see and feel and watch the Atonement of Jesus Christ make in us as we live to share it with others.  He is our motive.  Serve for Him, and you'll always have all the power  and energy you need. 

I need to keep hearing back from you. :)

Stay strong,
Love, your fellow soldier,
Elder Howard
Fiji Suva Hindi

Monday, November 16, 2015

Look the Savior in the Eyes

 Keep replying to my emails!  I want to keep hearing about how it's going over there!!  Let's not be strangers when we meet again in a year--rather family.

This week has just been more amazing than any before it.. and I always say that, but it just is always true.  I really mean it.  All of our converts are strong and sharing their fire with their whole neighborhoods and people are just flocking to the Savior's light.  I am especially proud of Shameer.  He's 15.  He comes out with us to all the people who knew him before he was Baptized, and they hardly recognize him because of the light he has and how powerful his spirit is.  There are sooo many people that are on the path to exaltation now.  We have been given a grander vision for our area, than we had ever known before.  We now know how to reach 60 people per week and help each one progress toward the Temple and become eternal families and live joyfully and connected to the life and happiness this restored Gospel brings. 

The Unity and Service:
On Thursday, each of our companionships had searched for Service and found nothing--so the Spirit whispered to me: lets all get together and have a district lunch where we write encouraging letters and testimonies to one another's most promising and struggling investigators and recent converts and returning members.  It was simple and SO fun.  We all had the time of our lives!  We LOVE this District.  We love working together.  This is more of a team than the Fiji Ruby Pro's are!  We had a prayer and had a nice simple lunch which each of us had contributed to, and began writing away to all these Saints.  The Spirit was strong and the unity was as if it were literally felt in the air.  We finished writing each companionship's saints, and then wrote letters to one another's families.  For example:  Everyone except for my trainee, Elder Datoon, wrote his family, thanking his family for who he is and what they see in him--and so on with every individual in the District. 

The Result of it:
Each of these letters proved to be VERY helpful and deeply meaningful.  Our saints read them every day and have expressed how deeply meaningful they were to them.  They have made a big difference.  Some of them have even taped up all our letters onto the walls of their homes and keep them as reminders to stay strong on the path and that they're not alone in this.

The effect of that service was at least 3fold.  It made our unity, just unbreakable-rock-solid as a District, it touched and continuously touches our saints, and it will continue to do good and re-affect them every time they will ever need the lift and strength in the future. 

I know the Lord inspires us with all we need and more, just by worrying about following one prompting from the Spirit at a time. (:

I know that the Savior is looking upon you at this moment, and you should acknowledge Him.  Your spirit remembers being with Him, and you are his best friend---that's real.  As real as all the prophets have ever testified, I so testify that your personal bond with Jesus Christ and your personal and loving heavenly Father is real and it is up to you whether you'll become the fullness of what They are.  That is their vision for you.  And you taking action on that vision is all it takes for it to happen, because They are eager to reach you to it.  

 There hasn't been a more Celestial time in all my life.  I look forward and realize that in a year I'll be married and starting my own eternal family.  And that right now, I'm able to harness the fullness of my divine potential to it's maximum.  I never fathomed that life could be so rich, so fully fulfilling.  It all comes from looking the Savior in the eyes.  Looking Him in the eyes and stepping behind them, to turn and see yourself in the light that you never considered.  The light behind His eyes.  Let it reach out to you and reach your soul and bear you to visions of His highest visions for you.  Because you're destined to do it.  You're destined to be your fullness--and He'll reach you to it.  If you look Him in the eyes and follow the path they see you'll walk.  if you'll walk the Covenant path with all your heart and form from Him a new heart in His own heart's image, you'll be gone--and His best version of you will finally be in full vitaliant life.  You need to see Him and let His spirit rise you to a higher version of you, every day.  That is your whole job, to becoming all you came to earth to become--even as He is.  He is real.  I know that, for I have seen Him.  I have seen His works in my life as if there were no veil.  Just as you may.  Your spirit remembers all your days you spent preparing to come to earth and prove yourself to your Father in heaven.  Now is your day to act.  Will you rise higher?  Will you let Him give you a vision of how to do it?  I pray you see Him as clearly as He sees you.  I testify of Him as a living personage of perfect love-- your brother.  He is more real than me, He is more involved in your life than even you yourself are.  I have seen what His Atonement does to sinners, for I saw what it did in myself, then I went 12,000kilometers to watch it do the same in the lives of so many others everywhere I go on this island.  I have seen His Atonement work, and must testify of it.  I know it is real.

I will be here for you, whenever you call on me.  I love you, because you're part of my family.  We all are.  We are literal children of the divine.  The time to live according to that knowledge fully, is now.
 love,
_Elder Howard

Sunday, November 8, 2015

I AM A DAD!!!!!!!

Hey!!!!! How are you?  How are things going in your area? In your life?  It's been a little while.  Here is what has been happening in Suva Hindi for Elder Howard:

(Please reply.  I want to know how things are going with you! :)



I am Training a brand-new missionary!  Elder Datoon!!!!!!  He just arrived in the field, and is incredible!!!! He is from Canada, but his nationality is Philipino.  He is 18 and is a fireball of consecrated perfection!!!!!  













Our first day together, we sat down and gave each other Priesthood Blessings by unified request from one another, and to dedicate our companionship and sanctify it and strengthen one another. We really have everything in common and deliberately chose to make this companionship legendary in its unity, fun, success, President Layton's 4 keys, love, exact obedience in ALL things and just purely full potential.  I told him our first day, "My mission isn't about me.  It really has now become all about you and everyone else.  My whole purpose is to help you reach your full potential."  We had great discussions like, "Did you have a best friend back home?  What was his name?  What qualities and what reasons made that person your best friend?"  He is AMAZING!!!!! 

In a conversation I had with Heavenly Father a week or two before transfers happened, He told me many things He wanted me to do when I met my trainee, if I were to train.  Some of those things were, that Heavenly Father told me I should suggest the idea that the two of us give one another blessings there in the house on the first day.  Also to, every night before bed, write a note on a sticky pad paper--Find the strongest moment of unity, fun, enjoyment, success, meaning and joy of the day together, and put it down on paper and hide it in his bed, suitcase, journal, or anywhere he will come across it throughout the next day.  God and I talked about how this will make it so in our minds we'll always have those powerfully bonded moments to draw back on if there are ever weak moments of the relationship that might come in days ahead.  So, I build those wonderful moments each day, and then write those immediately down simply in my planner, so that at the end of the day in private I can just quickly transfer the moment onto a sticky note and leave it for Elder Datoon.


Heavenly Father taught me that by doing this, I would see that as a child of God and disciple of Christ, I am to impact my circumstances, as always.  He said that by this principle, I would be able to control the companionships' positive memories of one another daily.  I would control the measure of unity with Him and him.

I have learned that relationships are like blinking.  To the other people outside the relationship, it seems they just are always moist, functioning well and good with no secret or work to it.  But it is constant good little things done deliberately and consistently one moment to the next, that keep the two eyes healthy, united and usable to the full maximum glorious potential.  

I love life.

Life is good. Always.

Thanks to the Atonement, and the most powerful trait: Gratitude.

Access the power of those 2 things.


Our house is like a Temple.  Not only is it now blessed, but it is as organized and clean as the Temple!  I told President Layton, "You need to send someone over for a flat check!"  We are so proud of it and the perfect habits we have established.  We love being here, it is just like the Temple in a lot of ways.  We just keep everything perfectly organized and clean.

Elder Datoon can already fully introduce himself in Hindi.  His pronunciation is perfect!  He has already invited (in perfect Hindi) an entire family to be baptized.  He has been EXACTLY exact in his obedience.  Before he arrived, I put a strip of paper in our main room in the most prominent spot, saying "Exact Obedience."  And it has been just that since day one.  We are exact on the beep of our watches' hour chime to transition to the next studies or whatever it be.  He has already established really wonderful relationships with almost every member of both Suva 1st and Suva 3rd.  They all know him and love him.  The Bishops met him and the Relief Society Presidents, and everyone.  The investigators all love him.  I love him with all my whole heart. 

I have to tell you honestly, that I have never seen any missionary in the Hindi Program pick up the language as fast as he is.  He hasn't even started his first full week and he is already successfully leading the mission rally IN FULL HINDI  in our companion study sessions!  He introduces himself to everyone we meet, and he does it with the most spot-on pronunciation.  I am honestly impressed.  I am very very impressed.

​We are almost exactly a year apart, so I can honestly say I understand him almost perfectly.  We are thriving together, and we're just a perfect match.  The love and unity of our companionship is influencing everyone around us--and the best part is that we can see it clearly!  We just watch it spill over into the lessons, the households, the wards, and everyone in the stores around us.. we realized from minute one in our companionship, that our unity would determine the strength of everyone in our district and zone and teaching influence.  We love to watch the Lord's powerful positive influence penetrate everybody He places around us.  It is just so fun to watch!

He blessed the Sacrament in church this past Sunday.  We talk in Hindi, we talk in Fijian, and in English, and in song.  We both love singing, together.

We started his training on the first day and have already finished week one. 

The other morning, right when we woke up, Heavenly Father taught me a really meaningful and richly symbolic, cool handshake for our companionship.  Elder Datoon and I spent a little while both excitedly putting it together.  We love it and really want to explain it next email.

We committed to exactness in all things and perfect unity.  We wear color matching ties and share ties and sing together and constantly laugh and just have a very strong and solid, close friendship.  Every night and every morning after comp prayer, we hug, say I love you and go straight to work.  We work out for the full 30 minutes every day!!! I LOVE IT!

He eats so healthy, just like me.  He has fully and with his whole heart embraced the culture.  The very first night, we went straight out to working hard and eating with the people in their humble settlements.  He loved eating in the dark with his hands in a mosquito infested settlement with no power.  He is just a constant battery of positive gratitude and happiness!  We are loving every second of the work, and Elder Datoon is growing and progressing very fast. 

The Mission is blessed with one of the most consecrated missionaries I have yet had the honor of observing in the field yet.

And I want you to know, I love you. Thanks for all you are.  I'm glad I know you.

I love the area, and I just love everything in life.  I can walk absolutely anywhere and up to absolutely anyone and make instant best friends with them!  Whether it is a group of people smoking and drinking, or a perfect little family, or a punk haired dude on the street, or someone that doesn't even speak one of my 3 mission languages, my people skills have become perfected.  Any age group, any class of people.  Every moment of my mission is now having fun, giving it my all, having no regrets, and building around 30 new strong friendships per day.  I love people and know how to work with them, no matter their backround or nationality or lifestyle.  This gift Heavenly Father has given me, I know will bless me all the rest of the days I have here in His work on this earth, and in every eternity to come.  Throw me in any situation, and with the Holy Ghost and all the skills He has developed in me, I am able to really enjoy it and make the best of it.  I really have a lot of fun in the work, and everyone around me does too.  We are at the brightest and highest point of our missions.  My people skills are now my strength--and I love it!  I know how to influence and lead and love and build up others, while building their respect for me and our mutual unity.  I have a special and unique friendship with each of the members and missionaries now.  The members flock around our dinner list.  We have wonderful relationships with everyone.

I know the area very well and am able to navigate.

Junior(Shameer, Asmin's son whom you witnessed the baptism of), is receiving the Priesthood and being advanced to the office of a Teacher next Sunday!  He is coming out teaching with us EVERY day!  He goes to school and helps his mom, and always makes time to come out and teach with us!  He is a completely changed person.  I would say, that he is perhaps one of the very greatest results of the mission Heavenly Father sent me on here to Fiji.  My heart overflows with pride in him whenever I see him.  He is fixed on serving his own mission and forever staying strong in the Restored gospel.  He speaks of his mission and wonders how he will finance it, but then always tells us, "Elders, my favorite word from the scriptures is 'faith'--I will live it."  He is doing his part.  He is a powerhouse in every lesson!

All of our Recent Converts are doing very well! 

We successfully handed over our entire Nasinu Area to the Hindi Elders over there.  We dedicated an entire day and all the numbers for key indicators we gathered from that days' work and gave it all to the other Elders.  We are so proud and pleased that our Area Book was up to date and ready to hand over and that we were able to build powerful relationships with the incoming companionship that will now be taking over for us.  We had such a wonderful day.  I gave gifts to Rachel and Shaun and made them promise me they would do 3 things, "Read the Book of Mormon every day. 2) Take the Sacrament there in the chapel with the members, every week. 3) Meet me at the Temple in February." They agreed.  Many tears were shed and we handed them over to the other Elders.  Shaun wants to serve his own mission, and Rachel has many referrals for the Elders now. 


I was also pleasantly enjoying the blessings of exact obedience as well.  My Fijian is more fluent than it even was on my 11th week in Bau!  I have reaped the blessings of exact obedience.  I haven't studied the language ever since I was called to the Hindi program except for exchanges where that was necessarily done.  And thanks to that obedience, I feel near-fluent and free in Fijian still!  I had a wonderful time joking with the natives and teaching them and playing games with the children and conversing with everyone and just basking in the glow of the Spirit that has preserved my tongue.  I am also able to answer just about any question Elder Cobabe or Elder Datoon ever have about the language.  I really am just enjoying exact obedience and all the mission life has to offer.

I feel perfect unity and love in our district.  They each have strong relationships with me and one another.  We have build very strong mutual respect.  They know I love them and we all love talking and edifying each other and being together and getting the work done and being fully obedient.  I am proud of the work and efforts my district is putting in.  We are about to make a lot of very positive changes in the way we approach the work in this district.  

So much more to say... SOOOO much more to say, but no time at all.  Please respond, so I can hear more about your week.  You are loved.
.

_Elder B. Howard
Suva Hindi

Sunday, November 1, 2015

That's What Lights Do

नमस्ते !!!  

How are you? I love you and thank you for all you're doing.  I hope you feel my prayers going your way and want you to know I feel your support, and it makes so much difference in the work here in Fiji.  
If your week was as amazing as mine, 
HIGHFIVECHESTBUMPUNBEARABLEHAPPINESS!

This has been maybe the very best week of my whole life on earth so far... and seriously, that might not actually be an exaggeration at all.  

This week will be a simple tribute to "My Family."  Asmin, Manjula, Shameer, Nafisha, Nikhil, and Shayal!  These 6 people... After my mission I will just have to get a lot of adoption papers and actually adopt these 2 families and my family all into one big, perfect family.  I am part of this family here in Fiji, and forever and eternally a part of my Celestial Howard family--I do have the best of every world.  

These 6 people got Baptized together 31 October, 2015.  
Me and Shayal, my little princess sister.


Right to left: Manjula, Shayal, Nikhil, Shameer, Nafisha, Asmin.  With Elder Luatua and myself.
I can straightforward and honestly say this is the highest most elated, celestial, happiest point of all my mission and life yet.  I can say that with all I am and it really i8s true.  This is it!  All, I mean ALL my prayers  and desires of my heart have been addressed perfectly by Heavenly Father.  If I do nothing more than just remember how good I felt this week, all my life, my whole life will be GREAT!  The mere memory of this week's Celestial feeling would carry me through anything.  There is no more pure joy except if I were with my wife, but I'm on a mission, so there is no higher that exists for me up to this point yet. 
God gives me a higher high every new day.

That pretty much sums up how Heavenly Father wants all His children to live.

Our hardest times and our happiest times, both have that potential.

I can say I know that.

Keep going forward, upward, outward = future unbounded outcome OF JOY! 


















The days before the Baptism were full on trials and testing.  But, they really had no power over any of us.  Our faith in the Savior, totally trumped it all and we all gave the opposition no power.  For example, the weather needed to be good in order for this Baptism to take place.  In Suva, that is asking for a blessing that is just not possible.  It is almost always raining here in Suva City.  One of Asmin's neighbors said to her, "you won't be able to be Baptized tomorrow.  The weather will be bad.  It is raining and cloudy."  Asmin, without a second of hesitation and with a spark of unquenchable light in her eye, said, "I am with the right God.  He won't let it rain.  You'll see.  I know He won't.  I am going to be Baptized."  

They did overcome all opposition.  They all came together and had the best moments  of any of our lives so far... the Baptism was perfect.  I don't know if I have ever been more perfectly happy.  That's saying a lot, but you really can't get in ANY kind of words how unearthly fantastic this day was!

These are people who laid everything down for Jesus Christ and their testimonies of the Restoration through the Prophet Joseph Smith and the Book of Mormon.  They are truly disciples of Jesus Christ.  Their past, is all given over to the Savior; all washed away, all the way pure and holy and blameless and clean and fresh and NEW.  





Shameer is 15.  He is my hero!  His testimony at his baptism, was the one that made my eyes flood and my smile almost rip my physical face...haha, he is my brother, and that's going to be forever.  And all of them!!! Each one!




The Fiji Mission President even came to their Baptism and spoke for it.  The room really felt like nothing you'd think you would be able to experience on this earth--the kind of transcendent joy that only the faintest memories of the deepest parts of your soul remember from the days before your birth when you lived personally with your loving and eternal heavenly Father while you accepted his plan, shouted for joy, and prepared to come down to this earth. 

These are the moments that make every moment of my life to have all been worth it--more than worth it.  

I gave a talk at the Baptism called, "The Journey Ahead."  Heavenly Father spoke through me to each of them individually about their full potential for the future even to the Celestial Kingdom.





President Monson calls us higher.  And we will take him up on it. 
I really am at the best point of my life yet, in every way.  A point which I have never before reached or known.  I feel like a little kid on his dad's shoulders... the height and growth is scary and unfamiliar.  It is that kind of thing.  A point at which I can decide what kind of influence I will have (Heavenly Father working through me).  We are each called to be ripplers.  The effect you can have is nearly without scope or limit, eternal, lasting, tremendous, and setting in motion innumerably grand chain reactions.  For a child of God, shouldn't there be no other choice? You are designed to choose radically the fullest measure of the light, the best, and nothing short of a fullness of your Savior's greatest desires and vision for you.  So you choose.  You choose by the Holy Spirit voice in all the being that makes up you.  And that is all up to you.  Take the power of a week--and just make sure by the end of the week you are up the ladder from where you were; in measurable and specific ways.  


I can see in amazement, that I am higher in my progress and abilities and formation of character and everything the mission had to make of me, than I had even hoped.  Humbly and simply, I've become all I ever set out to become.  And so now I have to catch a higher vision than I'd though of before.  Heavenly Father and I are working on the next steps of progress; and we've formed great plans and they are all being realized and actualized--because what Jesus Christ can make of you has no limit except for the limits you give it.  You can give him your past, you can give him your future, and you can be consecrated FULLy. 

"Consecration is the only surrender which is also a victory." 
                                                                                                      ~ Apostle Neal A. Maxwell

He gave me and has made me all I ever wanted, so now my cup is full and ready to nonstop and constantly steadily spill over into serving and growing others to their highest levels.  My (selfish) life is done.